The average American probably thinks that the French are utterly romantic people that bring flowers on the first date and have picture perfect dates. This is what we’ve learned about dating in France from all the movies that we’ve seen. While it might not be exactly like that, dating in France is a much different beast than what American dating has become.
- The first dates in France are usually in a group setting.
In the states, we usually won’t have group dates until we have become a serious couple. We also only do group dates with other serious couples.
In France, it is the complete opposite. Usually, the first date will be a social gathering with a group of friends. For instance, a dinner party with a bunch of single people. If there is some chemistry, then another group date will be scheduled.
- The French believe in traditional dating roles.
In the U.S., it is normal for a woman to ask a man out, or be overtly flirty. In France, it just isn’t done this way. The man initiates the dating game and the women go along for the ride.
- The first kiss seals the deal.
Americans are much more laissez-faire about being sexual with people we are dating. The French, on the other hand, consider a kiss to be a declaration of being in a serious relationship. There is no need to have the talk about whether they are now in a serious relationship. A kiss is a talk.
- The French don’t have a word for “dating”.
The closest word to “dating” in France is “appointment”. Most French people just say something like “I’m seeing someone”.
- They don’t date strangers.
In America, most people only date strangers. We meet people at a bar and hook-up, then set up a date to see if what happened was just lust, or if there is a possibility for love. In France, this is a very rare occurrence. Usually, they need to know someone very well before they go out on a one-on-one dinner date.
- Relationships are always serious.
When French people start seeing someone, they have already decided that it is someone they could see themselves marrying. In America, this seems laughable to most people. We have fun and then think about where it might lead much later.
Whatever you feel is the best way to start a relationship, it is good to know that there are other ways to go about it. No way is right or wrong, but one way definitely leaves people feeling disappointed when they thought it was serious. If you are tired of the endless hook-ups that go nowhere, check out GoMarry.com, where everyone is looking for something that could lead to marriage and you have the ability to get to know someone before you go out on a date with them. The “one” is out there, they are just waiting for you to find them!
