Depression is a tricky, complex issue that affects many different people in many different ways. There is not one cause. But certainly, one of the causes can be traumatic or abusive situations people have gone through. There are genetic factors that can make a person predisposed to depression, so if they experience something traumatic such as a poor relationship, depression could be triggered more quickly. The most important thing is that if you are in an unhealthy relationship or feel you are generally unhappy and could be depressed, seek help from a doctor and try to see a counselor.
One factor which can lead to depression is an abusive relationship. If a person controls you or treats you badly, it can often have a very bad effect on your mood. They may not want you to seek help or may deny that there is even a problem: this is something called gaslighting. This is where it is important to remove yourself from the situation.
The situation may not be abusive. It may just be that you are incompatible. If you do not have a lot in common and are not able to enjoy spending time together, it will be very difficult to be happy in the relationship. And if you are not doing things you enjoy, this could lead to you feeling depressed. So bad relationships can certainly be a catalyst. If you want to make sure you and your partner are compatible, take a look at ‘101 Practical Marriage Questions’ from GoMarry.com
If your relationship is not making you happy, and you are feeling depressed, it could be a good idea to work on your relationship in order to improve your mental state. Of course, you should never have all your happiness invested in one thing – be it a relationship, job, or hobby – but improving lots of different parts of your life, including your relationship, can help. Try doing new things together and talking about your issues. There is no solution to depression and difficult situations like communicating. Perhaps have a go at couple’s counseling: there is no shame in this, and it could help both of you feel better about your situation and give you things to work on independently.
Depression is very common. If you are in a relationship and you are depressed, it could be a factor. But at the same time, with roughly one in five people being affected by depression at some point in their life, it could just be bad timing. Examine the relationship to see if it is healthy, and if it is not, then you should prioritize yourself and leave the situation. There are lots of resources online for how to manage this and remember your friends and family can also help.
