Across the world, people strive to find their perfect match, the person that will “complete” them. The truth is that you don’t need love to complete you; you are already a whole person. Romantic love can enhance you but it is not a piece that is required for you to be fulfilled.
Life is Not a Fairytale
From a young age, society indoctrinates us into believing that your future should consist of finding your perfect love, getting married and settling down together. This story is repeated time and again in fairytales; it gives us the illusion that to find the happiness you need to find love. It is just not realistic. Love cannot make you whole. If that was the case then we would always be missing something and it makes the equation of wholeness very difficult if you break up or divorce. Being single is not a sin and there is nothing wrong with going it alone.
Relationships come and go and you make go through several before finding a lifelong partner. Each of these breakups causes us to hurt and causes negativity but it doesn’t take away the love you have to give others. Even people in happy relationships fight sometimes and can still get hurt. Running after relationships for love distracts from inner peace. It makes you focus on the ideas and beliefs of others, rather than on your personal values. You need to let go of wanting to stick to the norm and think of what will make your content. Do not feel forced into a relationship; it will create feelings of remorse and both parties will be unhappy.
Love Yourself First
To fully love someone you need to first love yourself. It is entirely natural to want love and a romantic relationship. This relationship will not take away your own insecurities, so you need to reflect on yourself and see how you can make yourself whole. You do not have to chase after a partner to be whole or happy. Strip away all of yourself and see what lies beneath everything when you are alone. Find happiness in your solitude, learn to be independent and then pursue love. If you want to focus on your career or travel the world, then go ahead and do that. You don’t need anybody’s permission to stay single and you don’t have to succumb to outside pressures to fit the norm of marrying.
As you grow individually your independence and confidence will start to shine. Spiritual growth will happen naturally and this will attract people to you. This is the perfect time to find a partner but always remember that you are whole, even if you are alone. A loving partner will accept you as you are, celebrate life’s achievements and be there for you when you are hurt.
