When your partner’s going through something, they may ask for some space. This can be one of the hardest things that a person in love can hear. But, however cold and distant your partner may seem by saying it, they’re actually trying to save your relationship.
During your cooling off period, here are some tips and facts that will remind you everything’s going to be ok:
- Set terms with your partner
When someone asks for space in a relationship, it’s important to set some ground rules. Ask your partner if they need a week, month or more? Is texting allowed and how often? What are the occasions when you can “stop“ the break? Don’t enter this state of your relationship without clearly discussing what it means and how long it will last. At the end of this period, you can reexamine how you felt and if both of you want to go on.
- Don’t take it personally
When a person asks to have a step from you, it’s only logical to see it as a personal insult. However, your partner wanting some space probably has ABSOLUTELY nothing to do with you. People usually require space in a relationship when they’re going through something hard or challenging and they need some alone time.
- See it as an opportunity
Remember all those things you couldn’t do while you were with your SO? Well, now you can! Think positively and see this space-period as an opportunity to focus on your hobbies and activities you like. If you neglected your friends a bit, now’s the time to reconnect. If you haven’t binge-watched a TV show alone while you were with your partner, now’s the time!
- Focus on yourself
Don’t obsess over your partner and try to take your own feelings into consideration. Practice self-improvement and try to come up with a list of goals you want to achieve. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, you’ll come out the other end as a new, better version of yourself. Maybe now’s the time to finally lose those 5 pounds!
- Don’t Judge and Criticize
Don’t attack your partner because you’re angry about them needing space in a relationship. After all, if they wanted to break up, they would, but they’re doing this because they want to keep you in their life. Hearing from your SO that they need the break can be one of the hardest things to hear for a person in love. However, resist the temptation of starting an argument or any type of conflict, because you will regret it later.
- Respect your partner’s wishes
Don’t break the rules that you’ve set together as a couple. If your partner asked for space, actually give them space. You will not help your situation, loneliness or insecurity if you reach out to your partner. Instead, you just might push them further away. Respect the wishes of your partner regarding the time frame of the break, the contact between you two, and any other rules that you set.
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