How to Manage the Balance of Power in a Relationship

How to Manage the Balance of Power in a Relationship

To manage the balance of power in a relationship is something rarely achieved. However, in a good relationship, the power generally swings back and forth fairly equally between partners


It is important to note that this dynamic is a personal choice. Some people prefer to be submissive while their partner enjoys being dominant.

The key factor here is the consideration of each partner’s needs as equally important. There are so many spheres within a relationship that calls for decision making. And it is common for couples to divide these spheres according to individual strengths and weaknesses.


Healthy Power

The best way to manage the balance of power in a relationship is to allocate the decision making according to what you and your partner feel comfortable with. Perhaps one of you is better at taking care of finances. While the other prefers to put their energy into the household chores. As long as you are both making a contribution, this will have a positive effect on the power dynamic.

When it comes to important decisions about your future as a couple such as kids, career direction or relocation. It is better to make these choices as a team.

A couple with a healthy power balance is good at compromising, sharing responsibilities and getting on the same page generally. In most cases, one partner will hold more sway about decisions. And that is okay as long as there are mutual respect and understanding.

Toxic Power

If you are in a toxic relationship, it is guaranteed that you will not be able to maintain the balance of power. Sometimes it is difficult to recognize unhealthy patterns in the midst of an emotional experience.

Here is a summary of what to look out for and avoid:

When you are involved with a power hungry partner. You won’t feel safe to express yourself or stand up for yourself, for fear of being met with contempt. As a result, you can’t get your needs met, which leads to feelings of loneliness and disconnection.

Your partner will always have to have the last word in a disagreement. He or she will not consider you when they make decisions, prioritizing their needs over the harmony of the relationship. They don’t respect you and regardless of how disappointed you are, as long as they get their way they will be content.

Powerlessness is the inability to affect change. Certain power hungry individuals will try to take your power from you. They will do this so that they can get their way and feel validated.

In extreme cases, this can result in threats and intimidation and is classified as abusive behavior. If this is the case for you, then you must leave ( the relationship immediately and seek help where you can.

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