ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR
WHY DOES LOVE MAKE US WANT REVENGE
I know it would sound irrational but I never took revenge on anyone in my life. Maybe because there was no reason and maybe because I think it’s an act that “digging two graves”. It’s full of resentment and self-destructive feelings. The same goes for “All is fair in love and war”. I would never act unfairly on purpose not because I’m an angel but because I don’t see a point in doing so.
MY FIRST REVENGE NIGHTMARE
My first boyfriend made me feel inferior when it comes to my looks. I have terribly handicapped all my life because of him and have to see my shrink for the second half of my life because all started there: “How fat and ugly you are. You don’t resemble a girl anymore”. I was always overweight and even obese in his opinion which didn’t stop him to be with me for two years. Years later I started a new diet every few weeks. I was a binge eater, anorexic and bulimic at the same time. It influenced my life in profound ways. Thoughts, memories, emotions, feelings of inferiority and bitterness still haunt me. Not for a moment. It left me with physical and psychical consequences. We broke up just at the time I lost my weight with hard diets and exercises. Was that a revenge for years of his cheating on me and belittling my body?
ESTABLISHING JUSTICE
No. I left him for another guy but it wasn’t planned. I didn’t even think about revenge. But for him, it was the worst possible revenge. So, It left me to wonder why people equal love and war and the term of revenge in both. I think that the main reasons for revenge are vanity and the feeling of being locked out. One becomes so frustrated and upset that revenge simply occupies his mind day and night. They think that they would feel easier if they retaliate in order to “establish justice” but the opposite is the case. When we fight back we hurt ourselves too with hatred and a set of negative emotions that will influence our character as well as our future decisions and life in general. We will set some standards like that revenge is a normal thing and then we will follow them. It won’t make us a better person, only worse. And the feeling of revenge won’t last and that of pity will!
THE BEST REVENGE YOU CAN TAKE
The best revenge you can take on someone who has hurt you is to smile, but naturally. You may want to see them punished for what they did but lets them be punished by not being punished. Believe me, it’s the best revenge. Once we are hurt we want the guilty party to suffer and that’s why love makes us want revenge. If your boyfriend cheated on you because the rules of hard play were acceptable as in war, what are you going to do? Is there anything you can do to change the situation? No. The past is gone. “And the only two areas of life in which you can be forgiven for doing anything are love and war”.
