Conflicts occur in pretty much all relationships, to varying degrees. Every relationship has its own individual issues and yours are no more difficult than anybody else’s.
Some relationships between people you may know look like they are perfect without a single moment of conflict to speak of. However, we say stop dreaming.
Check out how to pick your battles in relationships.
Being in a relationship for a decade now, I can guarantee better conflict management if you follow some simple tips and tricks.
You’ve been together a while, you get on each other’s nerves when you have had a bad day. That is normal. Try not to allow petty bickering to take over your relationship; it can be too easy to forget that the person you are with is there because you love each other. You may forget he is not a punching bag when work has been rubbish.
As the saying goes, treat others how you wish to be treated. The same is relevant in your partnership. If you have had a bad day, don’t take it out on your significant other. Instead, choose to talk to them and allow them to support you. You will both benefit from this and usually, as a result, you will be in a better mood. Your partner in crime is right by your side fighting your battles with you. Imagine coming home from a good day at work to be on the receiving end of someone else’s negative day. It is not fair to treat each other as someone to blame. After all, you are partners in life, not opponents. This kind of approach will avoid any arising conflicts between the two of you.
The Big Stuff
We are not talking about who left the toilet seat up or who forgot to double lock the door at night. These are not relevant in this category. And we implore you not to make these things into big conflicts. We all make mistakes and we all forget things. Hence, give each other the benefit of the doubt! Your understanding will be much more constructive than your criticism.
All relationships come with their fair share of trigger topics that result in ignoring each other for days or shouting matches. We encourage passion but use it in a positive way. Nobody enjoys conflicts so try not to prolong arguments and instead, try quickly to find resolutions.
Some big trigger topics may cause reoccurring arguments, so we suggest you ask yourself what needs to be done differently? Perhaps the big thing is deceit. Going over and over the same argument, in the same way, will only result in the same outcome. Try approaching the subject differently each time in order to find an effective resolution for you both.
Don’t be stubborn, if you have done something wrong just apologize. It really is that simple. Don’t go out of your way to negatively impact on each other’s day or week. Make sure you own up to your part to play in a conflict that has escalated. We want to avoid hurting each other not prolonging the hurt.
Forgiveness is much easier to ask for than expecting to move forward and things are forgotten. In order for your relationship to be able to mend correctly. You have to be willing to ask for and to give forgiveness.