Deal with a Perfectionist in a Relationship

There are certain types of people who make it easy to be in a relationship with them. On the other hand, there are perfectionists. These characters can make you question your partner’s affection, your relationship, and yourself.

Being married to a perfectionist can be an interesting experience: you get to spend time with someone who approves only the top-notch, and they’re married to you! When you read into it, that says a lot about your personality as well. However, living with a perfectionist can also drive you absolutely mad.

In this overview, we’re presenting the best strategies to deal with a perfectionist partner.

  1. Embrace Your Partner’s Personality

Many people don’t see perfectionism as a flaw, but it can be a very debilitating character trait. Just like with any other flaw, accept it and learn to love it as part of your partner’s identity. Don’t try to change your perfectionist partner or criticize them.

  1. Stand up for Yourself

Perfectionists can easily manipulate loved ones into doing what they want. After you’ve been living with a perfectionist for a while, you become aware that their way is the easiest way, so you stop doing things you want to do. Make sure that you stay aligned with all of your beliefs, opinions, and habits and don’t let the perfectionist bully you into change.

  1. Communicate and Compromise

Just like any other relationship, successful marriage or relationship with a perfectionist requires lots of communication. Be open and honest about your partner’s perfectionism. State your opinions and thoughts clearly, but don’t judge or criticize. Your partner probably already experiences negative consequences of perfectionism, so there’s no need to make it harder on them.

When you come across an issue which you don’t see eye-to-eye on, try to come to a compromise through productive conversation.

  1. Be Patient and Adjust

Living with and loving a perfectionist requires a lot of patience and tolerance. Remember that the more time you spend with your loved one, the more both of you will adapt to living with each other. Instead of venting your frustration in a non-productive way, talk all your issues out with your spouse. Remember: your partner is constantly adjusting to you as well.

  1. Work on Your Self Esteem

Perfectionist partners can hurt even the toughest of self esteems. If your partner has the superpower of finding a flaw in virtually anything, that might leave you vulnerable and questioning your own self-worth. Remember that self-esteem is intrinsic and never let it be influenced by external factors. Don’t let your partner or anyone else bring down your sense of self-worth.

  1. Stop Trying to Make Things Perfect

Stop trying to accommodate every whim of your perfectionist partner, because it’s very, very hard to satisfy them. The most important thing is to practice gratitude together with your partner, instead of constantly focusing on things that could be improved. Just relax, enjoy your relationship, and love your partner, however quirky they may be!

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